You're correct in saying that others reflect us. However, blissful talk about having someone else help you to feel better about yourself ignores the unfortunate fact that the entire Universe reflects what we think and feel about ourselves. One gets caught in a feedback loop between you and the Universe which is self-reinforcing:

So, if I love myself, the Universe assists. However, if I have negative feelings, and, face it, most of us do, then the Universe reflects me, and makes half-hearted attempts to "feel good" ineffective.

How to actually change? The trick is in cutting through the CONTENT, either good or bad, to experience DIRECTLY the intensity of the feedback mechanism. Then ALL the content, whether good or bad, simply drops, and one is left with the direct apprehension of how the feedback loop works, which is joy beyond joy.

Real change is just a little more subtle, but the pay-off is so much better than all the feel good stuff that never actually works.