Noelle, I'm so glad you read this little piece! Love really is so absolutely tricky. We have an outer layer, which we identify as us, but there are inner layers which we so generally are not even aware of. Of course, they get in the way and cause havoc at times. An interesting meditation you can try is to let yourself extend into the Earth and let it think for you. It might seem absolutely absurd, but it's real and then gives you a solidity few people even dream of. Light also pours in through the top of your head, but that's another story.
Then the Ex can do whatever foolishness he or she wants, but they won't carry you with them anymore.